Friday, June 13, 2008
im sorry dat i talked 2 ur dad n maybe caused u 2 b into some trouble again.
im sorry dat all i know is 2 love u n not 2 hate u or lose feelings 4 u.
im sorry dat i've been selfish n not understand dat u r definitely feeling worse den me.
don feel dat u caused me 2 suffer.
i've tot it thru n its not ur fault at all
although i hate it so much dat we just have 2 be friends only, i cant help it. ur dad said dat if we both still had feelings 4 each other aft my A's den maybe it'll work out cause he said i shud b more matured n he'll have no qualms holding us back. maybe till den if i can win u back again den deres no more hiding. but for now we could only b good friends dats all.
wad hurt me da most is dat u said u have no feelings for me anymore and dat a few days ago u said dat u still loved me. do u noe i trusted u so much? to da extent dat i was willing 2 believe all dat u've said. but when u told me dat i was just crushed. u dint have 2 be dat cruel if u wan me 2 give up u know? if u sat down with me and talked nicely without giving me da cold shoulder i'd have understood it so much better. i'd have relented. but when u said dat u had no more feelings 4 me i jus couldn't bring myself 2 believe it cause i feel dat ur lying however much i wanna trust u. ya u may say dat dats wad i feel only. but deep down inside u u surely must feel dat ur cheating urself too. i noe dat ur being cruel so dat i will give up completely n not wait 4 u but it shouldn't b done dis way. dis way i'll only feel pain, hurt.
i can only be ur friend now n i'd grab dis opportunity n nv let go. so long as i can see u, talk 2 u, feel ur presence, if lucky a hug, an accidental touch, ur smell, its da best i can have now.
i wun try 2 act like ur bf anymore. instead wad i hope is dat i can be ur friend. a very close one dat u can depend on. someone u can trust fully. n please please please don be cold 2 me anymore? i really don like u being so cold 2 me. i don like da feeling. would u promise on dis?
i still love u. n till how long it'll last i cant guarantee. but i know dat after my A's, u'll no doubt still be da only one in my heart. i hope. i hope, dat by den, i can make u fall 4 me once again.
Super Marcus signed off at 3:25 AM